Politics

The origin of the word politics:

Poly: many.
Ticks: little, blood-sucking parasites.

Software and Cars Don't Mix

When your car crashes, aren't you glad that software engineers don't write the deployment software? For instance, if:

Microsoft wrote it: "Are you really sure you want to deploy your airbags?"

Apple wrote it: "You can only enable airbags on up to five separate cars connected to your account."

Linux devs wrote it: "Couldn't find the drivers!"

UNIX devs wrote it: "What's a 'crash'?"

If the deployment code was written in Java, it would take 30 seconds to deploy.
If the deployment code was written in HTML, each car maker would deploy the airbags differently.

-Durth Cynic

Java...

You know why they named the Java programming language 'Java'? It's because you can start it compiling, go brew yourself a pot of coffee, drink a cup of coffee, drink another cup of coffee, go to the bathroom, and then get back to your desk before it finishes.

I hate Java. Or couldn't you tell?

-Durth Cynic

Definitions

High school: The point in your life when you realize that everything CAN get worse and everyone IS out to get you.

College: When you become your parent(s).

-Durth Cynic

College is...

...like getting a spike through your head. Sure, you get something new in there, but in the end, you're not really any better off.

-Durth Cynic

The Dark Lords Are Here!

Well, it was about time that we did this. By 'we' of course, I mean myself - the Dark Lord Durth Cynic - and my apprentices, Durth Sardonic and Durth Dearth. Of course, we are always looking for new recruits - how could we not? - but we offer a much better retirement plan than the Sith. No power-hungry apprentices looking to kill you here! Of course, you must be able to withstand verbal abuse to join. There's a reason why we have our names.

Come one, come all, and join in the absolutely punny enjoyment as we make fun of all things.

-Durth Cynic